I contacted Ron. He looked good in his pictures and they were recent. He is 54, 5'10", looking for a long term relationship, and is a vegetarian. Good enough.
We met on a Sunday at my favourite spot, Balzacs coffee shop. There was also a food festival of some sort going on in the district. Ron said he would be carrying his motorcycle jacket. He arrived a little late, but worth the wait, as he was great looking.
We got drinks, and started talking. It was almost too good to be true. We talked about anything and everything. Vacations we took, family, (he bought a duplex so that his mother could move in downstairs and he could look after her), work, (turns out he knows a couple of people I know in the film industry), foods we like, galleries we enjoy, everything.
I found a gluten-free lunch item at the food festival, and sat down to eat it, when my phone rang, and I ignored it, as I was having such a great time. It rang again, and I also got a text. It was from a friend who was going through a rough patch and needed me to come over and help her. I said I'd be there as soon as I could.
I apologized to Ron, but he said he'd drive me over there if I didn't mind riding his bike. That was very thoughtful of him, especially as it was interrupting our date. On the way over, he asked me if I liked Chinese food, and said that would be out next date. Next date. We were going to have another date!!!!
He dropped me off at the cafe my friend was at, and I introduced them.
After he left I told my friend about the great date, and that we were going on a second one.
The next day, I got this email:
Mary. I had a really nice time yesterday. A boy like me could really go for a girl
like you. You're attractive, seem to have your head screwed on right and are so
easy to get along with. But, as I look for a partner to move forward into semi
retirement and beyond (and I know this may sound ridiculous), the not driving
aspect strikes me as a major impedance. I don't mean around the city so much as I do road trips, holidays, car rentals, emergencies et al.
I'm sorry. Ron
I couldn't believe it! Because I didn't own a driver's license, he wasn't interested. He didn't even think to ask if I would consider getting one. So I shot one back saying that I was sorry he felt that way. Then I guess he felt he had to explain further.
I genuinely feel bad. I think we have a lot going on. But I know from experience that having both members of the team participating in all that driving entails is, in a nutshell, way better.
I didn't enter into this dating arena with driving as an issue. (Surprisingly I've yet to run into this.) And, as I was recapping our excursion, the idea of it kept surfacing and surfacing. Stupid I know. But I also know myself enough to know that I wouldn't be happy. I feel so bad and not just for you but for me too.
Anyway, good luck with it all, Ron
So there you have it!
Do you believe it?
I found it difficult.
Are you out there, you know, the one who wants to chauffeur me around? The one who isn't homophobic? The one who knows how to shake a girl's hand? The one who knows how to carry an interesting conversation? The one who is interested in me?
Perhaps I am asking too much.